being me – Page 68 – Pernille Ripp

She Has Gone Home

April 5, 2012 Pernille Ripp

The phone call came this afternoon. As I stepped out of a meeting the message light beckoned and on there was my mother’s voice giving me the inevitable news; mormor had passed. As we mourn as a family we cry not for her but for ourselves, for we are the children left behind. She gets what she wanted; peace and to be be with her husband. We also get what we wanted; her to be in peace, with no pain, together with the man whom she loved more than anything. And yet, the sorrow has just begun to settle in.

I now go through the world without any grandparents but that doesn’t mean I don’t have a past. I will show my children the videos of these two people who showed me what dedication and love means. What perseverance and staying together looks like in our much too frantic society. We have proof that love matters most; it is our veins, it is in our heritage. It is up to us to pass it on.

Tomorrow would be the day, 66 years ago, that my grandparents met each other and fell in love. I cannot think of anything more beautiful than that my grandmother got to go be with my grandfather once again. That perhaps tomorrow she gets to meet him again, wherever they are, and now they don’t ever have to leave the other one behind. So I smile through my tears and vow to never forget and to carry them with us wherever we go. Mormor heard about the twins, how they are a boy and a girl, and I cannot help but wonder if Ida and Oskar wont get just a little bit of my grandparents soul in them. I hope so.

being me

I Hope You Have a Home

March 28, 2012 Pernille Ripp

On Saturday, my mother got the call we had all been dreading. Come home, it is time, she is ready. My 98 year old grandmother had taken a turn for the worse and now had told the world that she was ready. A plane ride later, and a vigil kept and mormor is slowly slipping away. We get reports through emails and phone calls; no news, it just gets worse, she is ready to go home.

My family is not one seeped in religion, in fact, hardly anyone believes in an afterlife. So when my grandmother speaks of home, she does not speak of the heavenly version, or the eternal one, but the one where my grandfather is. As some of you know he passed December 14th, 2011 after 62 years of marriage to my grandmother. In those 62 years they spent one night apart, one night, and they hated it so much they never did it again. So home to my grandmother is wherever he is, wherever they can be together. And we wish nothing more for her than that she gets her wish even if it means leaving all of us who have looked to her for comfort, wisdom, and eternal optimism. Home is no longer with us. It is and always has been wherever morfar is.

So although it may be selfish, or it may even be cruel to others, I look at my own relationship with Brandon and I realize that he is my home. That wherever he is is where I need to be. And I am comforted that someday I will be in that same position, I understand what it means to be done with life so that you can be with the one you are supposed to be with. I understand when my mormor wishes for peace, saying she has lived enough, that she is ready and that we will be ok.

So in the end I wish nothing more for anyone, that they too have someone to come home to after a long life, after a lot of life. I hope you have a home.

being a teacher, being me, smartboards, Student-centered

Stop Telling Me Technology Engages

March 21, 2012 Pernille Ripp

Image from here

Not too long ago when I brought up my dislike for the cost of Smartboards working in a budget crunched district, I was told that there was no way I could dismiss the improvement of student engagement that it has created in my classroom. I met that statement with raised eyebrows and then shook my head. The Smartboard or whatever technology tool I may be using is not what increases engagement in my students; the content is. The tool does not engage; the learning does. Because if the tool is the only thing that engages then I would say we are in serious trouble. If the tool is the only thing we use to keep those kids tuned in and invested then we need to do some serious re-thinking of our curriculum and delivery.

So while districts can flaunt all of the technology tools they so happily purchase with or without teacher input, we cannot tout that our engagement level goes up just because of that purchase. We cannot say we are now 21st century districts, since in all sincerity this is the 21st century no matter what tools we have. Sure kids may be looking at the board or screen more when we have more technology, but how much of that is training or simple politeness; a feigned interest or hope that something engaging will show up on that screen? How much of that is because all of them are facing the board rather than in pods? How many of them long for getting out of their seats and do something rather than watch one person direct the learning?

So don’t tell me that putting a Smartboard in my room increases student engagement, in fact, please run any technology purchase by me so that I can investigate and dissect it. Don’t tell me that my students are eagerly anticipating their turn to click the magic board, that wears off after the first couple of days. Tell me instead that the curriculum we teach is worthwhile, that the learning that we DO is engaging, that my students are engaged because they choose to be and I put enough thought into what I am teaching to realize that. Tell me that and I will agree; the tool does not create the engagement, we do.

being a teacher, being me, student driven

Some Celebrate Test Scores – I Celebrate the Students

March 20, 2012July 24, 2013 Pernille Ripp

Once in a while the celebratory emails go out detailing how we are beating our districts’ average in test scores, how our school has grown as measured by these tests, how our students are progressing. And sure, those are reasons to celebrate but I prefer to celebrate for other reasons.

I celebrate that student that raises their hand with a differing opinion because more participation is their goal.

The child that steps back and lets other take on a leadership role even though they know just how they would do it.

The kids that know when to laugh, when to care, when to try, and when to do it all at the same time.

I celebrate the shy boy that becomes a leader with a new tool and stands behind his discovery, eager to show others how to do things.

I celebrate the class that continues to work, unfazed, even if I step out of the classroom to take care of something.

Those kids that groan when school is over and cheer when they hear the plans for the next day.

The student that asks if they can pose a blogging challenge because they know they have a really good one.

I celebrate those kids that look their parents in the eyes and tell them how much they have grown but that they are not there yet but they have a plan to reach their goal.

Those kids that tell me when they mess because they would rather tell me the truth even if they get into trouble over it.

The students that notice when someone is absent and wonder where they are.

I celebrate the community, the challenges, and the growth that I see every day, every week, and every year. As middle school sneaks into our futures, I celebrate these kids that have so much to give, so much to offer, and so much courage to keep trying.

Be the change, being me, challenge, life choices

I Must Apologize Beforehand – A Serial Apologizer Apologizes

March 10, 2012July 24, 2013 Pernille Ripp

Image from here

I have to start out by saying I am sorry for what I am about to post. It may offend, it may irk you a little, so thus the apology beforehand. See there now you are disarmed and perhaps it wont really be so bad, after all, the apology has already been given.

I am serial apologizer. Not for my life really but for the way I teach. I don’t flash the way I work in my classroom, which sounds ludicrous since I blog about it, but if you catch me in conversation, I am not one to tell you that what my kids do is pretty spectacular. That the kind of community I am part sometimes makes me deliriously happy. That I am so proud of all the work my students do, of the risks we take, and the mountains we climb. I don’t flaunt it because that would be too offensive.

And yet, for every time I hide what I do. For every time I don’t stand by the choices I have made in case I may offend someone, I chip away at my own desire as a teacher to be a world changer. My own world, the world of my students, and perhaps even the greater world outside of my room. For every time I wrap my teaching philosophy in apologies a little bit of it gets duller, less fantastic, until I wonder what I will be left with.

So why is it I feel the need to apologize? Because I am different? Because I have opinions? Because I vehemently believe that the focus has to be on the needs of the students and not that of the teacher? Because I believe in honest communication and not veiled lingo? Because I believe that you have to fight for change from within in any way you can and give your students that voice? Because I believe that we have to get the students involved in their own education so we don’t lose them, after all education should not be done to them but with them?

I am not sure, I am sorry, I really don’t know But it is making me think that I need to stop. I am starting to think that I need to stand by what I do a little taller, a little prouder and not diminish the choices I have made. The choice to be different in an otherwise cookie-cutter educational system because it is what I believe in. The choice to throw away punishment, lecturing, homework and grades as much as I can and instead focus on knowledge, exploration and the need to fail over and over again. The choice to change, the choice to not do it the way I was taught, and the choice to take risks. After all, it is working, I am sorry, but it is true.

being me, blogging

Don’t Tell Me You Read My Blog

March 2, 2012July 24, 2013 Pernille Ripp

Today I was flustered. Absolutely gobsmacked, probably would have turned bright red and almost tripped over a chair flustered. My retiring principal was giving a building tour to a principal candidate and stopped by my room. The candidate then told me that he reads my blog and had also seen my students’ webinar. For some reason this stooped me in my teaching tracks. The blogger Pernille would have had all sorts of scrupulous questions to ask about the candidate’s viewpoint of technology integration, global connections and student-centered learning. The real Pernille didn’t know what to say other than, “Welcome, this is our room and these are my kids” and then pretty much went on her way. Yikes.

The thing is, when I blog, I don’t really think anyone reads it, and yes I know how stupid that sounds, but perhaps if someone reads it they are really far away and I will never meet them. It is much easier to imagine no audience or one very far away such as in Antarctica or somewhere else remote. Somewhere where our paths will never cross. Of course, this is stupid of me to think as I can see where people visit my blog from, but still, to meet a “reader” face to face left me believing that I am very much an introvert. and definitely not as cool as the person who blogs here.

And yet, something I do take pride in is that I know that whatever that candidate has read on my blog, it is how I feel, it is how our classroom is, it is how I am as a teacher. The qualities of utmost important to me on my blog are transparency, honesty, and realness. There are things that are magical in my classroom but there are also many that are works in progress or that blow up in my face spectacularly. There are days where we are in a groove and others where I feel like I am lecturing to a door. Days where I feel I made a difference and days where I feel I had a negative impact on a child. But I blog no matter what, I blog whether it makes me look good or not. I put it out there for others to nod their heads and think they are not alone. There is a filter but only when it serves a purpose otherwise I do really put it all out there.

So if you ever happen to walk by my room, come on in, introduce yourself and feel me out. Let me know you are in the neighborhood and really curious. Let me know that my students sounded loud and engaged and you thought you would check it out. But whatever you do, leave the blog out of it for now, don’t tell me yet so I can let my guard down, let us settle into a conversation, feel each other out and learn a little bit. leave the blog out so I can share some of my secrets not thinking you already know them.