being a teacher, homework, students

I Know Worksheets are Bad and Yet I Assigned One

Pernille Ripp
There they lie; staring at me with their guilty weight of uselessness, reminding me how I made another mistake.  I thought I had them beat, that I had conquered the urge to assign them, and yet I slipped and now that pile of 32 math worksheets reminds me of why I gave up on them in the first place. I don’t know why I thought they would be a good idea, why I found them necessary that morning, but I did and now I have to come to term with what that means for me and for my students.  I know my good intentions of practice is hidden in there somewhere but I forgot to listen to my common sense, to look at my past mistakes, to think of the students.

We reach for worksheets when we want to make sure that students get something, when we want to have them practice, to secure a skill.  And yet who assigns worksheets with just a few problems?  After all, you want a lot of problems to make sure they really get it, that they will never forget.  So why didn’t I just assign them 5 problems to show me they knew, why the need for a double-sided sheet with 32 problems on it?  The time I must have robbed from my students outside life haunts me.

So I take my pride and put it aside and I realize I made a mistake.  Tomorrow I am going to have to tell the kids that, own it, and apologize.  It shows that i am still learning, that I make bad decisions too, I am nowhere near perfect as a teacher.  And I learn, I learn from my mistakes, from my good intentions gone bad.  I learn from the feedback of the students and I admit when I mess up.  That’s what makes us better teachers.  That’s what builds better classrooms.  Humility, humanity, and reflection.

being me

In Which I Reveal My Biggest Project Yet

Pernille Ripp
I have a hard time keeping secrets (because I get so excited) and did let this one slip to a couple of people but we are finally ready to reveal my biggest project to date.  Brandon and I are thrilled, astounded, and utterly in awe that we are expecting twins this summer.  For those who know, infertility has been a long journey for us and we have long considered Thea to be our miracle baby.  Thus the idea of two siblings for her is enough to make me cry with joy (and yes, there has been a lot of crying – double the hormones…).

So while my dedication to changing the world of education remains the same, my pace may slow down a bit.  After all, I can’t remember where I put the milk anymore let alone try to stay awake past 9 PM.  So bear with me these next few months of life-changing adventure and thank you all for all of the wonderful thoughts you have sent our way.  It worked!

The nurse actually said, “Ummm, I have a surprise for you…” and then showed us this.  She sure did – two beating hearts.

alfie kohn, merit pay, testing

Yes They Grew But Can I Take Credit For It?

Pernille Ripp
We are in the midst of testing season at my school.  The students are doing MAP tests, as well as their writing assessments and we gather to discuss the results, to think of strategies.  To rank, to sort, to file.  To highlight, to shine a light, and to discuss what is working and what isn’t.  We pat some teachers on the back – look at that growth, and we wonder what else we can do.  We wonder if merit pay is on the horizon and how we will be ranked, filed, and sorted.  That will be based on these test results on those students gains or losses and yet, can we really take credit for the gains that our students may have made?  Can those test results really be accredited to the teacher?

I often wonder how much growth my students do on their own?  How their brain creates new connections, new ideas, and new strategies for conquering the learning we do?  How much of that growth can be attributed to their parents or home environment rather than the school?  How many of those new connections can really be chalked up to their natural development as a growing child who all of a sudden gets it more?  Or even how much of their growth should be attributed to their first teachers, perhaps in daycare, pre-school or kindergarten?  Those teachers set the foundation, taught those students that school was safe and an environment they could continue their learning in.  Can I take credit for any of the growth shown a piece of paper?  I don’t know.

being a teacher, change, classroom expectations, our classroom

What Dreams Reminds Us Of

Pernille Ripp
Last night I lost control of my class.  It was a dream, of course, it being Sunday today, but I have had this dream before.  The students are older – nothing likethose  older students to be disrespectful.  The classroom is crowded – poor teaching conditions.  The task is simple and yet they don’t understand.  They talk amongst themselves.  They get up and move around to talk.  They are too busy, too bored, to listen to me.

So I raise my voice and I yell at them.  Except in this dream I always start to lose my voice thus leaving me  feeling powerless.  The students proceed with their misbehavior.

They rush into the task I have created, they do it wrong.  I signal for their attention by yelling but I cannot yell over the crowd.  They ignore me and we do not get through what we need to.

They start to answer my questions but they are doing it all wrong and the frustration increases until finally the bell rings; class dismissed. the students are upset, I am ready to quit teaching, and my heart is pounding.

The first time I had this dream I thought it was a reflection of me and it was; how I used to be.  How I used to control my classroom.  Yet this dream is nothing like my now classroom.  The students are the perfect age for me, they are moving around because they learn better that way.  They pay attention when they need to and I barely ever raise my voice.  Instead I wait until I get their attention and then provide them with the task.  But the biggest difference; the task itself.  In the dream the task is meaningless, not tied into anything, and totally controlled by me.  In reality our tasks are building blocks, shaped by the students and with a bigger purpose.

So I wake from  my nightmare shook up but aware that i have changed my reality.  That I no longer thrive on controlling my students but relish the freedom they have in my room.  Relish the community we have built.  relish the learning happening.  My brain may be playing tricks on me but it does serve a reminder of why I changed my classroom philosophy; I did it for the students.

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being me, happiness, projects

Won’t You Be Happy With Me?

Pernille Ripp
Whip cream, a quiet classroom, students reading, my daughter crashed in the car, Amos Lee…all things that have made me happy in the last 13 days.  How do I know this?  I have been documenting all of these small moments on my new blog The Happy Streak.  This is not a blog to write on but one used for personal reflection through cell phone pictures.  By then posting pictures of all of those small, usually insignificant and quickly forgotten moments of happiness, I am making myself a happier person overall.

Had you asked me on January 1st whether I had ever gone 13 days in a row being happy every single day, I would have said probably not, after all, being a teacher, a mother, a partner, a friend, a daughter all causes stress.  And yet here I am, 13 days into my happy streak and every single day I have indeed been happy.  Every day I have found smile inducing, grin bearing moments that have taken over the mood of the whole day.

This new adventure lets me record those small moments that bring the smiles.  Seeing my husband come home from work, a beautiful sunset, needing sunglasses in January, even the first snowstorm – all part of my happy streak.  By doing something as simple as taking a picture of that moment they take over my life and become the focus.  I catch myself all day now finding happy streak moments, wanting to record them, smiling about them.  I am so lucky, I have such a wonderful life, I am glad I finally realized this.  So won’t you be happy with me?  How will you realize your happy moments?  When will you begin your very own happy streak?

being a teacher, being me

I Don’t Want to Be Superwoman

Pernille Ripp
We worry about whether we are enough.  Whether we plan enough, whether we know enough, do we grow enough or are we outdated?  We worry about whether we are reaching them, teaching them, and always making them feel like they can do it, like they matter, like they belong.  We worry because that is what teachers do.  Did we do enough? Did we listen enough?  Did we let them speak, find their voice, share their passion?  Did we uncover their talents and boost their weaknesses?  How will they remember school?  How will they remember us?  Will it matter all of the tears, the time, the trouble we went through so that they knew they were important?

I know I am not superwoman, and nor would I ever want to be.  Superwoman isn’t human, she is too busy to sit down and listen to a story or see a lightbulb moment.  Superwoman has to save the world and my shoulders cannot carry that.  So I would rather be human, be me, be here in this classroom, at this time, working with these students.  Being there for them, catching the moments, guiding and stepping back.  Letting them fail and learning with them.  I would rather be me, thankful for this time, for this moment, for these challenges that I know I can carry.  Superwoman cannot invest, but I can, and I do, every day, every moment, even after they are gone.  They are my children and I grow with them.  That is what teachers do.