reflection – Page 4 – Pernille Ripp

I Need to Forgive Myself

September 16, 2014 Pernille Ripp

I have been rather contemplative as of late, not quite sure of myself, not quite sure of my worth as a teacher. I think many of us experience this every year as we start fresh, as we perhaps move grades, or move schools. Or even if we stay put, these new kids present us with a whole new world, and we forget that our old kids were once new to us as well.

So we beat ourselves up, think we are no longer great teachers, that we are not doing as well as the year before or that somehow we have already messed this year up. We lament our own limitations, highlight the things that are going wrong, and punish ourselves for not doing enough, teaching enough, being enough. We spend hours at night searching for solutions, new ideas, and new possibilities that will help us become that teacher again. That teacher that feels on top of the world. That teacher that feels like they did their part to help a child. Yet we forget that we already know a lot of what we need, that this too shall pass. That with each day and each moment with these kids, we get better, we grow together. The newness wears off and these kids became our new old kids and we settle into our groove.

So instead of continuing to beat myself up on this path of new, I am going to give myself a break. I am going to remember that I have never taught this grade level nor this curriculum before. That every day I AM trying something new even if it doesn’t feel that way. That it may not feel like I am becoming better or that we are growing together, but that we are, and I would know that if I only paid attention rather than beat myself up. I am forgiving myself for not being amazing. I am forgiving myself for not continually trying to be creative, push the boundaries. I am forgiving myself for the mistakes I am making every day. I am letting go of the need to try to be perfect, to even be great, and instead focusing on getting better, greatness will hopefully come some day.

I don’t know why i beat myself up. I don’t know why I pull myself down. But I do know that it doesn’t help. That reflection is great but self-doubt isn’t. I am learning once more to forgive myself for the teacher I am right now, with an eye on what I want to become. The path is there in front of me, I am already on my journey, but first I need to forgive myself. Do you?

PS: My second book comes out today. Empowered Schools, Empowered Students is finally ready for others to read, dissect, and hopefully like. Thank you to those who pre-ordered it.

I am a passionate teacher in Wisconsin, USA, who has taught 4, 5th, and 7th grade. Proud techy geek, and mass consumer of incredible books. Creator of the Global Read Aloud Project, Co-founder of EdCamp MadWI, and believer in all children. I have no awards or accolades except for the lightbulbs that go off in my students’ heads every day. First book “Passionate Learners – Giving Our Classrooms Back to Our Students” can be purchased now from Powerful Learning Press. Second book“Empowered Schools, Empowered Students – Creating Connected and Invested Learners” is out now from Corwin Press. Follow me on Twitter @PernilleRipp.

Be the change, being a teacher, being me, reflection, Student-centered, students

Are We Having Honest Conversations with Kids?

September 13, 2014 Pernille Ripp

The groan could have been heard for miles it seemed. The 7th grader in front of me looked at me with that look only kids can give you when you have said something that they hate.

“Post-its? I hate post-its, why do we have to use post-its?”

I bent down and said “Why?” took the few minutes to discuss and then knew I had to change what I was about to teach.

It was my first day of readers workshop with the students and I was pumped, I couldn’t wait to get them started on their journey to think deeper about their books, have better conversations, and boost their writing. And yet, already by the first hour, I had run into a boulder of disapproval.

In the past, I would have had a conversation with the student as well, but it would have centered on explaining why this was good for them, why they had to do it, and how they just had to trust me. This time though, I knew it wouldn’t be enough, that my role right now is not to force habits because I said so but rather create discussion and find habits that work for us. So I listened and we discussed and I realized that the student brought up points that I think of myself as I read through some of my lessons and it was time for me to admit it.

Being a teacher is sometimes like being an enforcer. We tell children what to do because we know best, we know the end point, and so we know the building blocks that they need to get there. We have discussions, we offer choice, but how often do we listen to what the students are telling us and admitting our own doubts or thoughts? How often do we admit our own adult habits and how they fly in the face of what we are teaching and then create a new path forward because we know the students might be right? How often do we listen when students tell us how they feel and then actually act upon it even if it means changing the way we teach?

We have to have honest conversations with our students. We have to be able to admit that sometimes the ideas we first had are not the ideas that are best suited for the children in front of us. That we as adults have developed habits that fly in the face of what we are teaching and yet we still manage to be deep thinkers. We have to admit that sometimes our lessons are not “real life” or even do-able for all of us. We have to admit that not everyone has the same path forward to whatever goal we may have set.

I speak to my students about developing as independent thinkers, yet I expect them to conform to all of the same rules in our classroom. I am not sure how to go forward, but I know something has to give. We may know what is best for most, but I need to know what is best for each. And that will take a lot of honest conversations.

being a teacher, Reading, reflection, students

Before You Assign a Reading Log

September 6, 2014September 10, 2014 Pernille Ripp

“…Mrs. Ripp, should we bring this home?” A student is waving the status of the class form I just had them glue in their notebook during our first week of 7th grade English. “No, please don’t,” I answer, “This is not a reading log, just a tool for you to use here in class.” I can see the relief spread across the student. They thought it was a reading log. I am glad it isn’t.

I have written about reading logs before; how I used to use them, how I had to use them, what to do instead. I know there is a possibility that Thea will have one at some point. And I worry about what that will do to her, how she will react not so much to the logging of reading, I do that myself through Goodreads, but the prize aspect, the reading to get something. You see, Thea reads for fun. Not because she naturally developed that, she would much rather read for prizes, which kid wouldn’t? But I have learned though her reactions to reading challenges to shield her from that, to build up that we read for the sheer enjoyment of reading. That we don’t get a reward when we finish a book other than the experience. That we talk about books and remember them that way, not to log them, not to see how many we can read so we can earn something.

Yet, I get why reading logs are used. Not all kids read, not all parents push reading as a thing to do every day. Some kids need a prize to get them motivated or a log to see their habits so they can develop better ones. Some teachers have to use them because of a school or district initiative, even though they would rather not. But here’s the thing; not every kid needs one. Just like every kid doesn’t need an intervention. Just like every kid doesn’t need homework help, not every kid needs to create better reading habits.

So instead of assigning a reading log to all if there has to be one, how about a tiered approach? How about a quick conversation with home or the student to discover reading habits? How about choice? I will gladly share with Thea’s teachers that we read for 30 minutes or more every night. That Thea pretends to read for another 30 after we tuck her in. That our house is filled with books. That going to the library or the book store is viewed as the biggest surprise. That getting a new book is something we celebrate. That we read the same books over and over because we love them so much. That we don’t need a reading log for that, we just need time.

I don’t have to do a reading log anymore so instead I asked my 7th graders about their reading habits to see who needs help establishing better habits. It doesn’t take long, it is not hard work, but the information I gained will help us grow. They don’t need reading logs, they need a place to jot down how much they read in class and a place to record their ratings of books. Their parents don’t need to be involved. There will be no prizes. They are expected to read and I can tell if they don’t through conversation. That works for me, for the students right now, and hopefully it will in the future as well.

For ideas of what to do instead of a reading log, here are some

I am a passionate teacher in Wisconsin, USA, who has taught 4, 5th, and 7th grade. Proud techy geek, and mass consumer of incredible books. Creator of the Global Read Aloud Project, Co-founder of EdCamp MadWI, and believer in all children. I have no awards or accolades except for the lightbulbs that go off in my students’ heads every day. First book “Passionate Learners – Giving Our Classrooms Back to Our Students” can be purchased now from Powerful Learning Press. Second book“Empowered Schools, Empowered Students – Creating Connected and Invested Learners” can be pre-ordered from Corwin Press now. Follow me on Twitter @PernilleRipp.

Be the change, being a teacher, new year, reflection, students

What I Learned My First Week of School

September 5, 2014September 5, 2014 Pernille Ripp

I thought I knew how to be a good teacher. After all, I have been doing alright in 5th grade. Yet, this week as I faced my awesome 7th graders, I realized that I still have so much to learn. That even though I have a few years under my belt, being new is still being new.

I learned that students wont automatically like you just because you are their teacher. That often we take that love and respect for granted in elementary but as they get older we have to work for it even more. The best part though is that I don’t mind working for it at all.

I learned that while I may think I am super human and can say yes to every project thrown my way, I am not. I have found my limits. I have found my tipping point. I am glad I did.

I learned that although I may have taught the same thing 5 times in a row, it is new to the students in front of me and they deserve the very best of me. Not the tired me. Not the rushed me. Not the “let’s just get through this” me. But the in-tune, attentive, fun-loving me. Every single student, every single time.

I learned that laughing at myself is a great way to get students to open up a little.

I learned that learning 118 names in 4 days is near impossible, even though I am soooooo close.

I learned that 7th graders still love picture book, hallelujah! They also love gruesome fairy tales and a good story. I think we will be okay.

I learned that you can win the team lottery twice in a row. That there are schools out there, districts even, that thrive on the positive, where teachers matter. Where ideas are shared, crazy thoughts supported, and small successes celebrated. These schools are no longer unicorns, they exist, and I hope everyone finds one.

I learned that being a team matters and that compromise is not a dirty word. We can still change education through compromise, through being kind, and that every person in a building brings something to the table. That being in a bubble and shutting your door should not be the norm, should not be okay. We have to get better at listening to each other.

But my biggest lesson this week; that 7th graders are so unbelievably great to teach. That my fears of not loving this age group as much as fifth was completely unfounded. That I am thankful for this chance of a new home, that “my kids” can really mean 118 students and not just 27. I am so lucky. I feel like I am home.

I am a passionate teacher in Wisconsin, USA, who has taught 4, 5th, and 7th grade. Proud techy geek, and mass consumer of incredible books. Creator of the Global Read Aloud Project, Co-founder of EdCamp MadWI, and believer in all children. I have no awards or accolades except for the lightbulbs that go off in my students’ heads every day. First book “Passionate Learners – Giving Our Classrooms Back to Our Students” can be purchased now from Powerful Learning Press. Second book“Empowered Schools, Empowered Students – Creating Connected and Invested Learners” can be pre-ordered from Corwin Press now. Follow me on Twitter @PernilleRipp.

being me, new year, reflection

Don’t Expect to Be Inspired

September 3, 2014 Pernille Ripp

I wanted to write something inspirational, gushing about the first days of school. Talking about the magic of them, the sheer adrenaline rush that carries us forth as we start to change lives. How our work is bigger than us and I can see the passion coming alive in the twinkle of my students’ eyes. But the truth is, I am too exhausted. My back hurts and so do my feet. My brain is going in circles, sporadically coming up with something that may turn into something, and oh the to do list has taken on a life of its own. So it is time for me to admit; I hate the first days of school. In fact, I think I even hate the first week.

I hate not knowing the kids. Sure, meeting them all for the first time is exciting, but not knowing their names upsets me. Not knowing what makes them tick slows me down. While I love hearing their expectations for the year and having them set the rules, I hate the process of it, because I want it to be in place already so we can move onto bigger things. I hate not knowing which books they prefer to read or how to best support them. I hate not knowing their handwriting or their writing voice. Right now, my 118 students are mostly just names that I yell out while taking attendance trying to see if I remembered correctly.

I hate that they don’t know me. We don’t have our world down. I don’t have anyone telling me I have to read a book or telling me their latest funny story. Instead they look at me, measure me up, trying to figure out who this crazy teacher is. I am judged with every word that comes from my mouth. I am contemplated whatever I do. The pressure can be nerve-wracking.

And yet, although I am ready to fast forward a month or even just a week, I see the seeds we have planted start to grow. A kid asks me for a book recommendation and I find him one he likes. Another shares a funny comment. And tonight, one child emailed me for help. We may not be a community yet. We may not get each other. They may not think I am funny ( like at all, 7th graders are a tough crowd!). They may not know the names of my kids or even feel that I am their teacher. But they do know I care. They do know that I love reading and writing. They do know that I am there.

So while the first week of school cannot end fast enough for me, I am a little bit in awe of the process that is happening with my kids. The trust they are starting to place in me. The small smiles. The little moments as they open up a touch. We are not there yet, in fact, we are not even close, but at least we have started our journey together. At least we are on the road. And still, can’t it just be the middle of February already?

I am a passionate teacher in Wisconsin, USA, who has taught 4, 5th, and 7th grade. Proud techy geek, and mass consumer of incredible books. Creator of the Global Read Aloud Project, Co-founder of EdCamp MadWI, and believer in all children. I have no awards or accolades except for the lightbulbs that go off in my students’ heads every day. First book “Passionate Learners – Giving Our Classrooms Back to Our Students” can be purchased now from Powerful Learning Press. Second book“Empowered Schools, Empowered Students – Creating Connected and Invested Learners” can be pre-ordered from Corwin Press now. Follow me on Twitter @PernilleRipp.

Be the change, being a teacher, new year, parents, reflection, students

Have You Included Parent Voice in Back to School Planning?

August 24, 2014 Pernille Ripp

On Wednesday, Theadora gets to meet her kindergarten teacher. We get to show up, me with all 4 of the kids, drop off her supplies and asnwer any questions the teacher may have. You would think I have a mile-long list of questions, but I don’t. I don’t know what to as at this point, that will come later, once school has started. And yet, I do have hopes and dreams for Thea and I hope I get to express that to her teacher.

This realization made me remember that I need to include my 7th grade parents’ voice in my back to school preparation. That yes, I may be planning awesome things for my first days of schools, and that yes I may be teaching students at an age of more independence from parents. But parents still need to have a voice in our classroom.

So I created my hopes and dreams survey. One simple question to get their feedback, to guide me as I prepare. Don’t forget to tap into parent knowledge. Don’t forget to reach out, even if you think their child is too old for you to ask. I don’t think any parent ever stops dreaming for their child, don’t forget to ask.

PS: In 5th grade, I used this

I am a passionate teacher in Wisconsin, USA, who has taught 4, 5th, and 7th grade. Proud techy geek, and mass consumer of incredible books. Creator of the Global Read Aloud Project, Co-founder of EdCamp MadWI, and believer in all children. I have no awards or accolades except for the lightbulbs that go off in my students’ heads every day. First book “Passionate Learners – Giving Our Classrooms Back to Our Students” can be purchased now from Powerful Learning Press. Second book“Empowered Schools, Empowered Students – Creating Connected and Invested Learners” can be pre-ordered from Corwin Press now. Follow me on Twitter @PernilleRipp.